


The Legate or the Missionary

by JulianJoyStark



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Burns, First Meeting, Internal Conflict, M/M, Not Beta Read, Religion, Slow Burn, focus on eyes, mentions of Caesar, not sexual
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-16
Updated: 2017-09-22
Packaged: 2018-12-30 14:17:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12110547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JulianJoyStark/pseuds/JulianJoyStark
Summary: Daniel's first experiences with Joshua Graham; New Canaan's longest running ghost story.





	1. Arrival

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I've ever published anything I've written and I am very nervous.   
> This may be non-compliant with canon because I really can't find much information on New Canaan, so I've improvised.  
> I wanted to tell the story of Joshua's return to New Canaan and I chose to do so through Daniel's thoughts and feelings.   
> Please don't judge me too hard !  
> This is not beta read so I apologize for any errors I didn't catch!

Daniel can remember the first time he saw those eyes. They were the bluest eyes he’d ever seen, though he couldn’t help but think they were missing something. At the time, he couldn’t quite put his finger on it. Of course at that particular moment he hadn’t had time to think about much of anything. A few hours earlier, a badly burned, and exhausted man had staggered into New Canaan, and then collapsed right in the center of town. 

Daniel hadn’t known exactly what to do when the man had been brought before him. His medical knowledge was advanced but this… This was out of his league. The man was unconscious, and peeling back the layer of bandaging revealed extensive burns all over his body. It was like nothing he had ever seen, or dealt with before. 

The burns were worse than Daniel had initially thought, the more bandaging he removed. He was amazed the man was still breathing. Some parts reminded him of Ghoulification he had seen on some of the caravan traders that had been by New Canaan. The burns were severe, but he could tell they hadn’t been inflicted recently. He placed them around two or three months of age, though the lack of proper care had kept them from healing completely. 

He was in the process of removing the worn bandages and replacing them with clean ones when those eyes had snapped open, and a rough hand had grabbed his wrist, hard. His eyes immediately darted to the man’s. They were unlike any eyes he’d seen before. Much bluer than anyone else's, and much angrier too. He hadn’t known what to say, but before he could say anything at all, the man was out again, the grip on his wrist loosening, and those eyes falling shut. It left Daniel feeling shaken, but he continued on with his task. 

When he had finished removing the dirty bandages and replacing them with clean ones, he looked over his work. The man hadn’t woken up again since the first time, and he was thankful for that. He knew he must have been in great pain. He’d used a few stimpacks in the areas that were exceptionally bad, and applied aloe to most of the other areas, but other than that he hadn’t given him anything else.

Outside of his home, he could hear the townspeople speaking through the windows. Their whispered voices were hard to make out, but he could hear a name. ‘Joshua Graham’. It only took a moment for him to make the connection, Joshua Graham… He looked to the unconscious man in front of him again. No, this couldn’t be him, no one could survive what had happened to Joshua Graham. Though, he couldn’t deny that it made sense. He left the man asleep, and headed out into the streets. As soon as he was out of his door, it seemed all eyes were on him. He wasn’t a very public person, so the attention was unsettling for him to say the least. 

He said nothing to the crowd watching him, but quietly made his way over to the church, entering it without so much as a word to anyone on the street. If anyone was going to truly know who the burned stranger was, it would be Mordecai, his Bishop. The Bishop was an elder in the community, he would know if it were truly Joshua Graham.


	2. Confirmation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bishop Mordecai sheds some light on the situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if chapter one was kind of boring!  
> I promise things will get more lively from here!

Daniel ascended the stairs of the church to the second floor, wondering what exactly he was going to ask the Bishop, how to word all the questions racing through his mind. It wasn’t exactly acceptable to ask question about the Malpais Legate, the monster Joshua Graham had become. No one dared speak of the fate of the former New Canaanite missionary. 

His Bishop Mordecai was an older man, no longer able to do much but oversee the missionaries and church operations. He couldn’t walk, but it wasn’t too much a burden on the community. He was still a loved and trusted individual, and Daniel knew he could come to him with this. He just hoped he wouldn’t be asking about anything that made the man uncomfortable. Mordecai had known Joshua Graham, he had been the one to send him on the mission trip that inevitably took him from New Canaan. So it was bound to be a sore subject.

Daniel found Mordecai at his desk, looking over some papers, reports from other missionaries that had been sent out recently. A courier had dropped them off this morning. He stood in the doorway and waited for the man at the desk to look at him. 

“How is your patient, Daniel?” Mordecai spoke, but didn’t look away from his papers. His tone was sad, it took Daniel off guard. 

Daniel pursed his lips, of course Mordecai already knew about the man who had come into town hours ago. Everyone in the town knew by now.

“He’s unconscious, badly burned though.” He gave an honest report on the stranger. 

“Yes, I expected as much.” Mordecai looked up from his papers. “Has he been awake at all?” 

Daniel looked down at his wrist, a red mark was left where the man had grabbed him, it would be bruised by tomorrow for sure. 

“He opened his eyes briefly while I was replacing his bandages but he fell unconscious again shortly after waking.” Daniel said, “He grabbed at my arm, but didn’t say anything.” 

Mordecai nodded silently, looking back down at his papers. “Bluest eyes in New Canaan.” He finally said quietly, after a long pause. 

Daniel could have sworn he’d heard the man wrong. He couldn’t have known about the man’s eyes unless… “I beg pardon?” 

“As a young man, he always had such bright blue eyes.” Mordecai continued, “The bluest of any of the New Canaanites, and bright with life.” The old man smiled to himself, “But that was a long time ago.” 

Daniel was awestruck, so it truly was Joshua Graham, lying unconscious back in his home. He hadn’t even had to ask any questions, Mordecai simply knew. “It’s true then?” He asked, almost panicked, “It’s him, the.. Malpais Legate? Joshua Graham?” He whispered the last two questions, worried if he spoke it too loudly there would be a punishment. 

“Well of course.” Mordecai said, sounding confident. “Though, only time will tell which one has returned to us.” He added, “The Legate, or the Missionary.” He looked up at Daniel again, setting his paperwork aside. “Either way, he is welcome back, and I would appreciate if you kept a close eye on his condition, please.” 

Daniel didn’t exactly know what to think of the situation. How could Mordecai be so forgiving to the monster that was the Malpais Legate? How could he welcome him back to New Canaan so easily? He thought he should be punished for his crimes but then, something clicked in his mind. 

He remembered those eyes, and the strong grip on his wrist, and he thought of the agony of having ones entire body scorched by flames. The anger drained from him almost as quickly as it had formed. He was a man of faith, if Bishop Mordecai could forgive, so could he. Joshua Graham had paid for his crimes, and he knew he would continue to pay for them every day, for as long as he continued to live, if he continued to live at all… 

“Yes sir, I will keep an eye on his condition.” He nodded at the old man, “And what should I do if...Any of the townspeople want to see him?” He asked, remembering all the gossipers outside his window, in the streets. 

“Tell them he will speak to them when he is ready. Give him time.” Mordecai smiled, knowing full well how nosy some of the New Canaanites could be. “He’s only just arrived this morning, I would give him a week before trying to speak with him.” 

“Yes sir, thank you.” Daniel nodded to the Bishop before making way back down the steps and out of the church.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading !


	3. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel meets the Malpais Legate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow we're already at 3 chapters !  
> If you want to talk to me about this fic, or anything, feel free to message me on tumblr my url is Julianjoystark.tumblr.com  
> As always thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy this chapter!  
> This is the longest chapter so far, and things really start to happen.

The same townspeople still stood in the street, chattering away about the new arrival. Some looked scared, some looked curious. Daniel made his way quickly past them, not wanting to stop and chat. He needed to get back home and check on his patient. Though, of course a flock of them had gathered outside of his door, waiting for him to return. He sighed when he spotted them, hoping they would all move aside when they saw him coming. Of course he was wrong. 

“When will we be able to speak with him?” One woman, an elder, asked. The others joined in, asking the same thing. 

“A few days, he’s very badly injured.” Daniel spoke quickly as he pushed past them and was able to make it to his door. He turned and addressed the small crowd. 

“Please don’t stick around here, it will only make things more difficult.” He said, before disappearing into his home. 

He sighed as the door closed behind him, he really didn’t want all this attention. He just wanted to practice his medicine in peace and wait for his turn to be sent out for missionary work. He certainly didn’t need to be put in charge of New Canaan’s most popular tall tale… 

He looked to where he had left the man on the bed in the clinic section of his home, only to find it empty. His eyes went wide, where could the man have gone? Daniel began to panic, trying to rationalize with himself that he couldn’t have gotten far, he couldn’t even keep conscious that long. He also couldn’t have left the house, of the townspeople outside would have known. 

He began to look around the house, trying not to let his annoyance get the best of him. He hadn’t even been gone that long, how could the man have gotten away from him that quickly? He looked in the kitchen, but he wasn’t in there. Then he looked to the bathroom, but he wasn’t there either. He sighed, feeling at a loss, until he heard the distinct sound of papers being moved around, coming from his bedroom. 

Very annoyed now, Daniel headed for his bedroom. He’d had many patients in his home but none of them had ever violated his personal space like this. He didn’t care if it was the Malpais Legate himself, he was going to give him a piece of his mind when he found him. Though, all of that anger he’d built up seemed to drain from his mind as soon as he threw his bedroom door open to find those eyes staring at him, piercing through him. Anger was replaced with fear. 

The bandaged man was standing in his bedroom, near his writing desk, it was evident by the messy state of the papers that he had been shuffling through them. His gaze was locked straight on Daniel. A single paper was still in his hand, but he was silent. 

Daniel was frozen in place, with both shock and fear coursing through him. He managed to avert his gaze from the others eyes to notice the paper he was trying to take from the pile. It was the notes he’d written up on ‘The Stranger’s’ condition. 

“You..Can’t have those. I need them for my files.” He said, voice only slightly shaking. He looked into Joshua’s eyes again, and they narrowed at him.

Joshua set the paper back down on the desk, slowly, never breaking eye contact with Daniel. He was truly a terrifying presence, and if the stories Daniel had heard about the Malpais Legate were even half true, he was a dangerous one as well. He was suddenly regretting agreeing to watch over the man and keep him at his clinic. 

When Joshua didn’t respond to him verbally, just kept on staring at him, Daniel decided it best to introduce himself. 

“My name is Daniel, you were brought to me for medical help after you arrived.” He started off, “Do you… Remember seeing me when you woke up?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at the still staring man. 

Joshua took a step forward, and in return Daniel found himself taking two steps back. It was nearly impossible to read any emotion from the other, as only his eyes were visible. The rest of his face, and body, were covered in plain white bandages. His eyes narrowed at Daniel again, but Daniel kept his distance nonetheless. 

“If I were here to harm you, I’d have done it already.” Joshua spoke finally, his voice was deep and rough, but Daniel wasn’t sure what he was expecting. He was surprised he could understand him so clearly through the bandages. “I just want to see if your wrist is okay.”

He took another step towards Daniel, but Daniel’s instincts kicked in and he took another step back. 

“It’s fine, maybe a slight bruise but that’s all.” He wondered briefly why the Malpais Legate, the cruelest man he’d ever heard of, was worried about his wrist. “Do you.. Are you feeling alright?” Daniel decided to shift the conversation back into something he could deal with easily, a conversation between a doctor and his patient. 

“I’m fine.” Joshua answered, though Daniel didn’t believe that. No one with such extensive injuries could be ‘fine’. 

“Right.” Daniel let his disbelief show, “Why don’t you go back out to the clinic and lie down?” He offered, moving out of the doorway to let the man through. 

“I don’t need to lie down, I’m fine.” Joshua repeated, and crossed his arms over his chest. Daniel noted the rigidness of his movements, he must be in pain. 

Daniel hesitated a moment, choosing his next words carefully. “It’s against my beliefs but, I have some Med-X I could offer you, for the pain.” He hated to offer, but he had some on hand for the caravans that would come through needing medical treatment. He wished people wouldn’t touch chems, or alcohol, but he could make an exception in this case. However, he wasn’t expecting what he heard from the other.

Joshua laughed. It wasn’t a warm laugh, it was low and rough sounding. It made Daniel feel uncomfortable, and spiked his fear. 

“Even if I weren’t immune to chems, I would still decline.” He said, after he’d finished laughing. “I’m a New Canaanite, same as you.” 

Daniel wanted to argue with him, tell him he was not a New Canaanite, he was a Legate in Caesar's Legion, his place here was lost. However, his Bishop’s words stilled his tongue, Joshua Graham was welcome back to New Canaan, no matter how many atrocities he had performed. It was the way of the Father, and it was the way of the New Canaanite to forgive. SO why did he still feel so bitter?

“I know who you are.” Daniel’s voice came out cold, it didn’t even sound like his own. “You’re the Malpais Legate, Joshua Graham.” Daniel took on the other’s stance, crossing his arms over his chest as well.

Joshua’s eyes narrowed at him again, and he quickly walked towards Daniel, backing him out of the doorway and against the wall in the hallway. Daniel looked up at him, terrified.

“If you know so much about me, then you know of my exile from the Legion, and my punishment for my failure at Hoover Dam.” His voice was cold, and sharp. Daniel could feel the heat coming off of the man as he trapped him against the wall, he could see the rage in those eyes. This was the Malpais Legate, there was no doubt in Daniel’s mind about that. 

Daniel wasn’t defenseless, far from it, though he did try to keep violence to a minimum in his life. As much as he feared the man in front of him, he had no trouble freeing himself with a hard shove to the man’s chest. When Joshua stumbled backwards Daniel advanced, shoving him again, this time onto the ground in the doorway of the bedroom. 

He was out of breath, from the adrenaline and the fear, as he looked down to address the bandaged man on the floor.

“Do not attempt to corner in my own home again, or I will be forced to defend myself.” He started, “I don’t care how much a heartless monster you are, if you’re here to bring harm to New Canaan, or harm to me, I will strike you down.” A part of himself that he tried very hard to keep in check was showing, and Daniel disliked it, but it seemed the only way to make sure he was being understood. 

He watched as the Legate struggled to his feet. There was blood on the bandaging in some areas, soaked through from the wounds beneath them. When the man steadied himself, he saw those eyes again, but they were different. Any trace of anger, or malice, was gone from them. They seemed… Empty. He thought back to what Mordecai had said, ‘The bluest of any of the New Canaanites, and bright with life.’ The eyes he was looking into now were dull. Still strikingly blue, but void of life. They were the eyes of a man who had seen too much, a man who had done too much. 

“My apologies.” The rough voice broke Daniel from his thoughts. “I did not come here to cause harm, I can promise you that.” Daniel noticed how he leaned against the doorway for support, and he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes. 

“Go lie down in the clinic… You’re clearly still suffering from exhaustion, and you should probably have something to drink as well.” Joshua complied, making his way past him and heading back out to the clinic silently.

Daniel was dismissive of the other’s apology, he had no time for that. He still needed to clean up the mess of papers on his desk and work out what he was going to do with the man for the next week. He was dangerous, that much was obvious. Unpredictable and dangerous were a deadly combination. He was going to have quite the week ahead of him, and he wasn’t looking forward to any of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading !


	4. Forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel struggles to forgive, and a meal is shared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first half of this chapter deals with Daniel's internal struggle to forgive, and the second half is an awkward dinner.   
> I noticed while I was playing Honest Hearts the second time that it's actually really easy to make Daniel mad.

Daniel had to step out for a bit, run some errands around town, make a few house calls, and check up on the elders in the town. Talk was all around town about his patient, but he was under no obligation to discuss it with anyone. He tried to keep his conversations brief and on topic, all the while hoping Joshua wasn’t rummaging around his house again. 

Some of the townspeople even gave him gifts to pass onto the Legate, and expressed their gratitude that he’d returned. Daniel tried his best to understand it, but he just couldn’t. How could they welcome him back so readily? They didn’t even know if he was there to slaughter them all, as he had slaughtered countless others. The man was a monster, but they were all acting like he’d never even left New Canaan, like he was a saint. 

It made Daniel angry, not because everyone was was so accepting, but because he couldn't bring himself to feel that way. He tried so hard, but he couldn’t find in him to feel anything but fear, and anger towards Joshua Graham. He had lived in fear of stories of the Malpais Legate, he had felt shame to learn the man was a New Canaanite. Joshua Graham was unforgivable in his eyes, and that scared him. 

Was he a bad person? Was he not a man of God? Why couldn’t he forgive, as everyone else was able to? Why did he feel cold? He wanted to forgive, but forgiveness would not come to him. This wasn’t the way of the New Canaanite, this wasn’t the way of the Lord. It made him feel sick. 

Daniel could pretend though, he was skilled enough at it. He could hide how he felt, he could feign forgiveness. He hated to lie, but sometimes lying was all he could do. He could plaster a smile on his face and talk with the people like there was nothing wrong, it was easy, he’d done it before. 

He made his way home before sundown, it had been a long day that had started rather poorly, and he still needed to make dinner for himself and the Legate. He pondered for a moment whether the man would be able to eat or when the last time he’d eaten was. It must have taken him months, at least, to reach New Canaan from the Grand Canyon, and by the state of his health when he arrived he hadn’t done much taking care of himself. 

When he entered the home, he took a quick glance over at the clinic to find the other man lying where he’d left him, though his back was turned to him, and a half empty bottle of water was next to him on bed. He wondered if he was asleep, or just lying there, but he didn’t say anything to greet him. He set the bag of ‘gifts’ he’d received on Joshua’s behalf down on a small table near his armchair and then made his way to the kitchen to get dinner started.

He started cutting up potatoes and put a pot of water on the stove to boil. Gecko steak and potatoes would be fine for him, but he wasn’t sure if his ‘guest’ would eat that. He sighed and set down his knife, wiping his hands on a towel he entered the front room quietly, as not to startle Joshua. This proved to be a fruitless effort however, for as soon as he was behind the man, Joshua turned over quickly and grabbed his wrist, in the same spot as earlier. There eyes met once again, and Joshua’s seemed to burn with anger as they did the first time he’d seen them. 

Daniel winced and pulled his arm away, “Stop doing that! It’s only me!” He hadn’t meant to shout, but now his wrist would be bruised for sure. He wasn’t sure how someone with such extensive injuries could have such a strong grip.

He watched as the other’s expression softened. Those eyes dulled into the empty ones he’d seen before leaving the house, and he noted how his body seemed to relax as well. Joshua moved to an upright position, and Daniel stepped closer to stop him. 

“Don’t sit up.” He leaned forward, pressing a hand to Joshua’s chest to urge him back down, but there was no use and the man sat up anyhow. Daniel noted that he felt warm, even through the thick vest he was wearing. “I’m making dinner, are you…” He paused, thinking of what he might say. “Are you capable of eating?” That wasn’t exactly how he meant to word it, and Joshua’s narrowing eyes told him it was the wrong way of doing it. 

“I’m ‘capable’ of eating, yes.” Joshua replied, “It took me three months to travel here, I was not burned just yesterday you know.” He looked down at Daniel’s hand, which was still on his chest. 

Daniel pulled his hand away quickly, “Three months…” He repeated quietly, “That must have been excruciatingly painful.” Something about that sat strangely with Daniel. 

“I have been through, and survived, worse.” Joshua said, likely in reference to his punishment at the hand of Caesar. He sounded so unphased by the things that had happened to him, that also sat strangely with Daniel. Perhaps he really was as heartless as the stories he’d always heard. Though, he also pondered the idea that the man could be in shock, either from his injuries, or the traumatic experiences he had endured. Either way, his apathy made Daniel uncomfortable, and his anger with the man was starting to come back to him. 

Daniel sighed, turning away from him to head back to the kitchen. “Just let me know if you want dinner or not. It’s gecko steak and potatoes.” He heard the other man get up behind him, and started walking towards the kitchen to distance himself from him. 

“Would you like some help?” Joshua asked, but didn’t bother to wait for a reply as he followed him into the kitchen. 

Daniel got back to cutting the potatoes he’d left on the counter, and sighed. “Wash your hands first.” He said out of habit, but quickly realized his mistake. He turned to the look at Joshua who was heading to the sink, in spite of the pain it would likely cause him to wash his hands. “Wait, don’t do that, it’s not going to help you any.” 

Joshua looked at him inquisitively, “I think it will be fine.” He said, moving to turn the tap on, but Daniel reached out and grabbed the man’s sleeve, stopping him before he could reach it. 

“I don’t mean to offend you but…” He paused, glancing at the other’s exposed fingertips. They were charred, likely a breeding ground for bacteria. “I don’t really want you to touch any of the food.” It came out meaner than he had meant it, and Joshua pulled his arm away from his grip and narrowed his eyes at him.

“Fine.” Joshua’s tone was somewhere between angry and disappointed, Daniel couldn’t quite place it. He watched as Joshua moved to sit in one of the chairs at the kitchen table. Daniel was used to living alone, but he still had two chairs, in the rare case someone would visit him for more than medical help. 

Sighing, he got back to the potatoes, again. Cutting them in halves to be boiled, before placing them in the water on the stove. He could feel Joshua staring at him, and it was making him uneasy. Why hadn’t he just gone back to the front room? He closed his eyes for a moment, trying not to let it bother him too much. Opening them again, he moved to the fridge to get the gecko steaks out and start prepping them for the frying pan. 

After a short while of silence, and being stared at, Daniel couldn’t take it anymore. He needed Joshua to either leave the room, or start talking. 

“So, what’s Caesar like?” The question was the first thing he could think of, though after the words left his mouth he realized it was likely not the best one to be asking. He heard Joshua sigh, it sounded almost sad. 

“I don’t want to talk about Caesar.” Was his reply, “How old are you?” He countered with a question, Daniel had expected that. He didn’t expect his second question though, “Have you ever left New Canaan?” 

“I’m Twenty-Four.” He answered, flipping one steak over in the pan, “I’ve been sent into Zion Canyon a few times to do some Missionary work with the tribes there, but that’s all.” 

The only response he got was a quiet ‘interesting’ from Joshua. He wasn’t sure why it was particularly interesting, he hadn’t gone off and started a genocidal army of slavers on his missionary leave, not that that was the normal thing to do. 

The silence had returned, and stretched on for an uncomfortable amount of time before Joshua spoke again, “How long am I to stay here, with you?” 

Daniel took the steaks out of the pan and plated them, “A week, at least.” He answered, not bothering to turn and face the man. He instead moved to the stove to get the potatoes out of the boiling water. “Just until you’re…” He wasn’t sure what to say. Until he was sure he wasn’t a threat? Until he was domesticated like an animal? Until what? “Until I can be sure you’re stable.” Right. Stable was a good word. He needed to be sure he was stable, both physically and mentally. 

“Stable.” Joshua repeated, “You have a strange way of wording things, Daniel.” Joshua laughed, only a little, and only quietly, but he had laughed. It wasn’t like the cold laugh he’d heard from earlier, this one seemed almost genuine. Almost. 

Daniel wasn’t sure what to make of it, but it didn’t matter, dinner was ready. He set one plate in front of Joshua, along with a bottle of purified water. “You need to drink more water.” He said softly, “You were dehydrated when you arrived, and you likely still are.” He grabbed himself a Sunset Sarsaparilla and sat across from Joshua with his own plate. 

They ate in silence, it didn’t bother Daniel much. He had his food to focus on, so the silence wasn’t as overbearing as it had been while he cooked. He glanced up a few times, just to make sure Joshua was eating alright. The man had pulled the bandages down from his mouth, and was eating slowly. That was satisfactory enough for Daniel, though he did wish he’d drink more water. 

For a brief moment, Daniel was able to forget that the man in front of him had ever been the monster in all his childhood stories. He’d finished his meal first, and was idly sipping at his soda, waiting for Joshua to finish his so he could clean the plates and put them away. Joshua didn’t look up at him at all, he kept his eyes downcast for the entirety of dinner. Daniel wondered what he could be thinking about, but found it best not ask, and also found himself too tired to really care. 

“I’m going to put my plate in the sink, when you’re finished I’d like you to do that also.” He’d wash them in the morning. Daniel got up, pushing his chair in and discarding his now empty bottle into the trash bin. He put his plate and fork in the sink and then turned to Joshua, who was looking up at him. “I’m going to my room, if you need anything from me you know where it is.” He tried not to sound too annoyed. “I’d like you to rest some more when you’re done, and I’ll see you in the morning.”

Joshua nodded at him, and Daniel nodded back before heading out of the kitchen and towards his bedroom. He sat down at his desk and sighed. The day had been stressful to say the least, and he was glad it was almost over. How he was going to handle the rest of the week was a mystery to him, but he was sure he would survive. He looked down at the notes on his desk, the ones he’d written up in the morning on ‘The Stranger’. Grabbing his pen, he scribbled out the name, and replaced it with ‘Joshua Graham’. 

Daniel got up from the desk after filing the notes away in his medical folders. He removed his boots and set them by the bed, followed by his neatly folded jeans and shirt. He turned his light out and climbed into his bed, welcoming the comfort after the long day. Now all he needed to worry about was the Malpais Legate murdering him in his sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading !   
> Hope you enjoyed it !


	5. Conversation.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel tries to talk it out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So from this point on, instead of chapters being updated every day it will probably be every 2 days or so ! Just so everyone knows!   
> I hope you enjoy!

The next morning Daniel awoke, the first thing on his mind was that he was still alive. Good, he thought, he hadn’t been murdered in his sleep. Through the window he could see the sunrise signaling to him that it was time to get up and start his day. With a sigh, he sat up and got out of bed. 

Daniel always started his day with a shower, it made him feel like he was starting each day with a clean slate. After the day he’d had yesterday, he needed a clean slate. He grabbed his clothes and headed to the bathroom across the hall. Inside the bathroom was something he wasn’t quite expecting.

The waste bin was full of bandages, more specifically, it was full of Joshua’s bandages. He’d changed his own bandages? Daniel wondered when he’d done it, and why he hadn’t asked him to do it. He was the doctor here after all, and he was in charge of his care. He also wondered if the man had even done it right, and how could he be sure. Joshua was in bad enough shape already from lack of proper care, he didn’t need to keep adding on to the list of things Daniel needed to correct. He pushed the thought from his mind temporarily and began to run his shower. 

The shower lasted a bit longer than normal, but he blamed that on all the thoughts he had racing through his head. How long would he be able to keep Joshua contained in his house? When would he start asking if he could leave? Would he even ask to leave? Why had he even come back, certainly not to stay cooped up in the clinic, but where would he even go from there? 

Daniel’s morning shower left him feeling less than rejuvenated, and it was all Joshua Graham’s fault. 

He turned the water off and stepped out of the shower before grabbing a towel and drying off. A quick inspection of his wrist revealed a slight bruise around it, hopefully there would be no more incidents like that today. He just needed to remember not to startle Joshua or try to wake him up if he saw him sleeping, or at the very least to do it from afar. 

After he’d dressed and combed his hair Daniel headed out to the kitchen to start on breakfast, he wasn’t surprised to find Joshua already awake and in the kitche. He was sitting at the table, where Daniel had last seen him the previous night. He was surprised however, to find Joshua had taken his Bible from his bedroom and was reading it. When had he gotten that? Had he gone in Daniel’s room while he was asleep? The thought ignited the anger in him again. 

Normally, he wouldn’t object to anyone wanting to read the word of the Lord, it was his duty to encourage it. However Joshua’s continued lack of care for his personal space and privacy had him seeing red. “That isn’t yours.” He snapped, snatching the Bible from Joshua’s hands. “Where did you get this? Were you in my room again?” He folded his arms over his chest and stared down at the bandaged man, a frown set on his face. 

Joshua seemed only slightly startled when the book had been ripped from his hands, he looked up at Daniel inquisitively, but he didn’t look at ll angered. “I was simply borrowing it from you. I imagine mine is still with Edwa-” He stopped himself, and Daniel noted how his gaze shifted downwards. 

Daniel stared at him, waiting for more of an explanation, but when it didn’t come he let out a frustrated sigh, “Stop going into my bedroom, you have no right to be in there, and don’t touch my things without asking me first.” His tone was like that of a parent disciplining a child. Joshua still didn’t seem to respond, and that made him uncomfortable. What had he been about to tell him? Who was he speaking about? Everytime he seemed to have words with Joshua it left more questions than answers, he hated that. 

“Excuse me.” Joshua said, before getting up from the table and heading back into the front room, leaving Daniel standing in the kitchen, Bible in hand, feeling confused and only a small bit remorseful. Perhaps he’d been too hard on the man? No, he needed to learn not to violate a person’s privacy. Maybe the Legion could take whatever they wanted from who ever they wanted, but this wasn’t the Legion. Perhaps that was the lesson Joshua needed, after all he did need to be fully independent within a week. 

Still, Daniel felt bad for seemingly upsetting him. He sighed and followed after him. “You can borrow it if you’d like.” He said, offering the Bible back to Joshua, who was sitting on the bed in the clinic. “I’m...Sorry for being so abrasive.” He forced the apology.

Joshua took the book, and set it down beside himself. “I’ll refrain from going into your bedroom again.” Daniel noted that Joshua still looked unhappy. He sighed, and sat down in the armchair across from the bed. He looked over, and was reminded of the gifts he’d been given by the townspeople to pass on to Joshua. 

“Oh. I forgot yesterday, these are you for.” He said, grabbing the small bag and passing it over to Joshua, “Some of the women in town had gifts for you, mostly the older women…” He paused, “They’re glad you’re back.” 

Joshua accepted the bag but looked confused. “They are?” It was a genuine question, he sounded surprised. He looked through the contents of the bag as Daniel watched. It was mostly letters, some caps, prepackaged foods, and conveniently, a Bible. He searched Joshua’s face for any discernible emotion, but he found that he just looked uncomfortable. 

“You’re surprised that people are happy you’re back, that’s understandable.” Daniel was honest with him, “I was also surprised, but it’s the way of the lord to forgive.” He left out the part where he still didn’t think Joshua could be forgiven, it wouldn't help here. 

Joshua nodded, setting the items aside, “Yes, the New Canaanites are a forgiving people.” He said, “Most of them anyway.” His gaze landed on Daniel, only for a moment, and Daniel looked away. He didn’t need any lessons on forgiveness from Joshua Graham. 

“I’m going to start making breakfast, do you want some?” He changed the subject, getting up from his chair and heading back to the kitchen. “It’s bread with mutifruit slices.” 

Joshua got up to follow him, Daniel noticed he often did that when he left him in one room. “I suppose you still won't let me help?” He asked as he followed behind Daniel. 

“I am very serious about cleanliness.” Daniel answered, a bit too fast. “Speaking of which, I noticed that you changed your own bandages.” He turned to frown at Joshua, “Why didn’t you ask me to do it? I am the doctor after all, you’re under my care.” 

Joshua laughed, in that same hollow way as before. “First of all, you were asleep. Second, I know how to change my own bandages, I’ve done it many times before.” 

“I’m sure you have.” Daniel would give him that, “But you’re injuries haven’t healed completely, or properly, as a result of poor care. It’s better to let me take care of them.” Joshua rolled his eyes, and Daniel couldn’t help but laugh at the sight, the Malpais Legate, was standing in his kitchen rolling his eyes at him. “I’m serious Joshua.” Though it was hard to sound serious when he was laughing. 

 

“Well if you don’t go to bed before me tonight, I’ll let you change them.” Joshua agreed. “Will you let me help you with breakfast at least?” He asked. Daniel thought about it for a moment, contemplating whether or not he could live with letting Joshua touch any of the food. 

He sighed and nodded, “You can put the bread on the plates.” He couldn’t do too much harm putting bread on plates. He’d considered letting him cut the mutifruit, but he still wasn’t sure how much he could trust him with a knife. He looked in the sink for the plates he’d left there last night, but he found they had already been washed and were already put away. He turned to Joshua, who was trying to locate the bread. “Did you wash the dishes?” 

“Yes.” The answer was simple, there was no explanation behind it, Joshua hadn’t even looked over at him. 

Daniel frowned, “I didn’t want you to do that. Submerging your hands in water is not going to help them.” He heard Joshua laugh again, and he sighed. Why didn’t he take him seriously? He of all people would know what was good for one's health. “Don’t laugh at me Joshua.” The laughter continued. 

“Just tell me where the bread is so I can put it on the plates.” He looked at Daniel, and for some reason Daniel wondered if he was smiling under his bandages. He then found himself wondering if hurt to smile, and what other actions hurt? He’d have to go through that with him. 

He moved from his place at the sink where he was rinsing the mutifruits off to grab the bread out of the bread box. “It’s pre-sliced, so just place one slice on each plate.” 

 

“Yes I think I can handle that.” He said mumbled, shaking his head. Of course Daniel knew he was capable of simple tasks, but it was much easier to get a feel for him this way. 

Daniel returned to his spot at the counter and went on cutting up the murftuit into even slices before putting them on the plates as well. He then took the plates and set them at the table, along with two bottles of purified water. Daniel took a seat at the table and Joshua followed suit. 

“I’m meeting with a caravan today for new medical supplies.” Daniel said as they ate, “I need more bandages than I’d thought.” He looked Joshua over briefly. “So I’ll be gone for a while, but I should be back by noon or so.” He wondered what Joshua would do while he was gone, besides go through his personal things. 

After a short period of silence, he finally responded, “Could I accompany you?” It was a question Daniel had been expecting, but wasn’t quite looking forward to. 

“No.” He kept it simple, hoping there would be no more discussion about it. He’d told Joshua he needed to stay in the clinic for a week, and he was not about to try to drag him around town all day. The people would be hard enough to deal with, and he still wasn’t sure if the burned man could handle that. 

Joshua just nodded, and went on eating his mutifruit slices. An uncomfortable silence fell over them, and Daniel took the opportunity to ask a question that had been bothering him since the man had arrived the previous day. 

“Why did you come here?” He knew it was likely a risky question, but he needed the answer. 

Joshua looked up at him, those eyes locking on his own again, they looked sad. “What would you have done?” The question hung in the air, as Daniel wasn’t sure how to answer it. 

“I wouldn’t have survived, I’m still not sure how you did.” He was honest. As far as miracles go, Joshua Graham’s survival was the biggest one he’d ever seen. The man should be nothing but a charred corpse at the bottom of the Grand Canyon, and yet here he sat eating fruit slices in his kitchen. It was hard for Daniel to wrap his mind around. 

“I’m quite durable.” Was the only answer that came, and it didn’t satisfy Daniel at all. He still didn’t have an answer to his original question. 

 

“You didn’t answer my question Joshua.” He kept his voice stern, he wasn’t going to drop this until he got an answer. 

Joshua exhaled, “No, I suppose I didn’t.” He was silent for a moment, before averting his gaze from Daniel, he instead focused on the space just left of Daniel’s head. “I didn’t really know where else to go. I thought if I returned, I could somehow start over. Make up for the things I’ve done.” 

So he had come here for forgiveness, either from God, the people, or both. Daniel nodded, he was satisfied with that answer. Though, he didn’t think there would ever be a way for Joshua to make up for the things he’d done. He got up from his seat and took both of their plates, now empty. “I’m going to head out. Don’t go into my room while I’m gone, please.” 

 

Joshua remained seated, as he watched Daniel move around the kitchen. “Will you at least give me something to do while you’re gone? If you’re going to keep me here.” He crossed his arms over his chest and Daniel sighed. 

“I’m not keeping you here because I want to.” He said, “The last thing I want is to be sharing my home with someone I was always told would kill me.” He realized the last bit had been unnecessary when Joshua’s eyes narrowed at him. “I promised my Bishop I would keep you here and look after you for a week, until I was sure you would be able to go about on your own.” 

He ignored anything Joshua might have to say to him and walked to the front door, grabbing his hat putting it on, “Behave.” Was his last word before slipping out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading !   
> As always if you any questions about this fic or just wanna talk you can message me on tumblr at Julianjoystark.tumblr.com i accept anonymous messages if you're shy !

**Author's Note:**

> A short fist chapter I know, but I just wanted to get a feel for posting.   
> Ill be trying to work on a weekly update schedule (if anyone takes interest)   
> thank you for reading !


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